(no subject)

[clodia_risa]

Dear Abby, you're a bitch.

Short version of the Q is: my husband insists on combined Christmases, his parents, my parents, and us. His parents have bad talked my parents, and aren't that nice to me. I have told him that this is uncomfortable and unhappy for me, and have offered alternatives in which we deal with them separately over the two days of X-mas, but he refuses to compromise. "It is my Christmas, too. I know it's only one day, but why should I have to compromise and be unhappy for the rest of my life?"

A)"You have to compromise because, when you married your wonderful husband, you blended your family with his -- obnoxious and pretentious as they may be. You compromise because marriage IS compromise. Keep the spirits bright by keeping the atmosphere as light as possible -- and your in-laws separate from your parents. And remember that the illusion of the "perfect family" is just that -- an illusion."

What the hell, woman? His parents disparage hers, make her feel crappy, and you tell her to suck it up when he won't listen to her and will not compromise? It's not like she's asking to never speak to them again - just not deal with them, and her parents, and her inconsiderate husband at the same time. Yeah, Christmas is about family, but why should she "compromise" AKA give in to her husband's wishes, when he's not willing to compromise at all?

And she is trying to keep her in-laws separate from her parents. By seeing them on separate days. What is wrong with you?

Comments

[flutingfrenzy.livejournal.com]

I thought that was kind of an unusual response for her, too...why don't you send her a nicer version of that reaction? Sometimes she addresses them in her column.

[clodia-risa.livejournal.com]

Nicer and more coherent too. I might do that. She really dropped the ball on this one.

I thought L was a woman at first, in your icon.